Why this blog?

Last night, I was laying in bed falling asleep.  I didn't want to be laying in bed falling asleep.  I wanted to be awake and watching a movie, I wanted to be eating delicious food.  I wanted to be dancing in the bedroom.  Basically I wanted to do anything except be going to sleep.  There could be a lot of reasons for this, like the fact that I am a night person and not a morning person.  The thought of me being a morning person gives me heartburn.  No no, I had anxiety.
All the responsibilities of the week echo through my head every night as I try to sleep.  When I think of everything I have to do, it makes me not want to do it.  Imagine that.  It makes me want to curl in a ball in my nice warm bed and go into an actual coma where I can just dream up my own cool movies with cool plots that I can watch all night.
Alas, that is not life.  That's the thing about life.  You have to face it every day.  There are responsiblites and realities and hard work things.
I did what I always do when I'm tired and can't sleep because my brain is ruining my attitude.  I spoon Scott.  Something about cuddling soothes me and helps me get tired.  So I did that, and it was working.
As I was drifting off, a funny memory popped into my brain.  I started to giggle in bed.  It felt so good to have that little moment of relief and to laugh at life instead of dread it the next day.

My brain was all, "YOU NEED TO WRITE THAT MEMORY DOWN!  THAT IS HILARIOUS!!"  and I was like,
"You're right brain, but I'm lying in bed right now trying to sleep. Better do it tomorrow."
Brain responded, "YOU WILL FORGET.  YOU FORGET EVERYTHING!"
and I was all,
 "Yeah, you're right.  I need a place to go to, a journal or something that I can write down all the stuff that makes me laugh and smile so that when I'm anxious, I can go on it and giggle until I feel better again."
 Brain said,
 "THAT'S BRILLIANT!  LETS DO IT FIRST THING IN THE MORNING! YOU ARE AWESOME.   WE WILL START OUT WITH TONIGHT'S AWESOME MEMORY."
Me:  "Yes.  Perfect.  Wait.  What memory was it again."
 Brain: "......"
Me: "......"
Brain: "WE FORGOT DIDN'T WE?"
Me:  "Yep."
Brain.  "I TOLD YOU."
Me: "I know, but thanks for cheering me up."
Brain.  "Hey no problem man.  We can figure it out tomorrow."
Me: "Sweet."

So anyway, now you know why I'm doing this.  It's mostly for me to document my beautiful insanity, and also to make myself happy. Happiness is a choice.  I will fight for that choice as often as I need to.  Also, I will write down anything that makes me crack a smile during the day.  Whether or not "Brain" and I are too lazy to explain it all, remains to be questioned.  We will cross that bridge when we come to it.  Me and my good ol brainey.